Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
