She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
The air was thick with penises
I will pee on everything he values.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
