Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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