need another drink. this is the easiest way
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
