How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
