our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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