It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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