I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
