I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
