You're my little dorito
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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