my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
