I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
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