you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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