it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
