I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
