There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
