awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
