it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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