the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
