DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
