oh god the rape fog is back!
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
