you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
