Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
