apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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