drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
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