we're making bets on your personal life
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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