Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
