is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My balls are so social today.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
