he shaved USA in his pubs
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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