winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize