dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
my liver is dry heaving
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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