Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
