Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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