My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
