i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize