Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
