She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
