I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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