i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
