nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
