lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
