ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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