"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
