Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
He did a backflip because drugs
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