i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
