he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
