I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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