Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Are we still banned from the library?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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