Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize