The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
This house was built for laser tag.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
